Is It Time for Mom or Dad to Make a Move?

Is It Time for Mom or Dad to Make a Move?

The trip home to visit Mom or Dad over the holidays is sometimes accompanied by an unwelcome surprise. For some of us, it has been almost two years since the last time we have been with our older parents, and the changes in their lives can be somewhat of a shock. The house seems too warm. There isn’t fresh food in the fridge. Common household chores seem neglected. Mom seems more absent-minded than she usually does.

As you left them to head to your own home after the holidays, maybe you’ve brought with you an uneasy and worried feeling. Is Mom or Dad safe? Is it time for them to make a move?

The prospect of making a change in your parents’ living situation can feel overwhelming. Here are some first steps to help you and your family prepare for this next phase of your lives.

Evaluate Your Parent’s Current Situation and Needs

It’s good to listen to your gut and internal alarm system when it comes to the health and welfare of your parents, but all of those warning systems churn up fear, anxiety, stress, and worries that can get in the way of figuring out what you need to do next. 

After those alarms are triggered, you might want to take a moment to process your emotions (through journaling or with a friend, sibling, or trusted counselor) so that you can allow the reality of the situation to move from your heart to your head. 

From that space, you can begin to ask logical questions about what needs to happen next. What are your parent’s current needs? Is the situation urgent, or do you have time to plan your next steps? Here are several markers to watch for that can help you determine if it is, indeed, time for your parent to move into an assisted living environment.

Have the Conversation

That settles it, Mom or Dad need to make a change. It’s a new year, and it’s time for a new phase of life. All you need to do now is get Mom or Dad on board.

Easier said than done, right? If you have them, go in with reinforcements. It helps to have your siblings all on the same page before broaching the subject with your parents. 

Try not to put off the conversation. The best time probably isn’t going to come, and delaying the conversation will only create a more urgent situation down the road, when you might be forced to have it. 

When you do sit down together, it may take a couple of conversations to help your parents understand the need to move. Don’t give up! It can be difficult to have “the Senior Talk,” but it’s an important one you don’t want to keep kicking down the road.

Begin to Plan with Your Family

The decision and process of leaving a home that your parents may have lived in for decades is an emotional one. The move may be accompanied by both grief and excitement as your parents move from one phase of their lives to the next. Siblings may have different feelings about the process than you as well.

It can be hard to get everyone on the same page, but mediation tips, like making a list of priorities for the new residence, visiting multiple sites, and seeking the help of someone outside of your family can all help make this process smooth. Download our family mediation guide to help your family members get on the same page with each other’s priorities and expectations as you move forward.

New Beginnings Can Be Exciting!

Many people feel dread when it comes to the subject of assisted living, but it doesn’t have to be this way. Danbury Senior Living offers resort-style living for the next phase of life. As you enter the new year with your parents, you can reposition the conversation from dread to hope and excitement. This is a new phase of life, a fresh start, and assisted living can offer your parents the kind of freedom and independence they haven’t been able to experience in years due to their home limitations.


If you’re ready to get started, our team of professionals at Danbury Senior Living can help you begin to navigate this new terrain with confidence and hope. Learn more today.

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